Author Topic: Motherly Love? (not 100% serious)  (Read 1414 times)

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Offline RegnisTheGreat

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Motherly Love? (not 100% serious)
« on: November 30, 2009, 12:42:54 am »
Okay, I'm not 100% serious about this but I just noticed something. You know what Freud says about kids being attracted to their parents? (eg. the son will look for someone like the mom and the daugther will look for someone like the dad).

My dad is from Beijing and my mom is from Guangzhou. I just noticed that pretty much the vast majority (80%) of the woman I added as a favorite are from Guangzhou.

Just noticed... nothing out of the ordinary right?

shaun

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RE: Motherly Love? (not 100% serious)
« Reply #1 on: November 30, 2009, 05:10:15 am »
It is something I have often wondered but from a different perspective being an average white male, if you couldn't tell by the avitar.

I took care of my father the last four years of his life.  He died at the age of 80.  He desperately wanted a wife that would take care of him including... well... you know.  I think that was when my ex decided to divorce me.  She was looking forward to the day that I didn't want it anymore.  Hehe, the good news is that it looks like that never leaves a man.  Off subject I know.

Anyhow, dad looked for the mothering type. If a woman would fuss at and about him and tell him what he needed to do he was happy as a lark.

Maybe because of my experience with him I wonder, sometimes, if I am doing the same thing, looking for a woman to take care of my like my mother did when I was growing up.  I don't think of it often buy YOU had to bring it up. :icon_cheesygrin:

Vince G

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RE: Motherly Love? (not 100% serious)
« Reply #2 on: November 30, 2009, 08:52:20 am »
Don't worry, it's not that your looking for a copy of your mother. It's more of who your comfortable with. Even in looks it's done. Which makes sense. If your uncomfortable with a woman's looks? Why would you date her?

Offline wilsbrough

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RE: Motherly Love? (not 100% serious)
« Reply #3 on: November 30, 2009, 03:11:56 pm »
What was that Greek Chaps name? Oedipus right....? :icon_cheesygrin::icon_cheesygrin:
Every now and then i get a little bit nervous at the death of all the years have gone by....!

Offline Neil

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RE: Motherly Love? (not 100% serious)
« Reply #4 on: November 30, 2009, 03:40:34 pm »
When I realized that Nina has a similar body style to my ex wife, I was pretty shocked.  Nina and the ex are so totally different in every other way.  As humans we are geared to see similarities and patterns.  It's only natural for us to see those similarities in the ones we love.  After all, they are the ones we scrutinize the most.
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Offline David E

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RE: Motherly Love? (not 100% serious)
« Reply #5 on: November 30, 2009, 05:18:05 pm »
If you're interested in the psychology of this sort of thing, it is about what is known as the "Imago" theory....which suggests that in our search for "romantic love" we are seeking to find our "lost-self"

This lost self is the deeply stored memories for our formative years and basically put there by our "significant others"...these can be parents, relatives, even friends. They are the blueprints of our deeply held belief as to who will "make me happy'

Problem is, when looking to find our lost self, we look for those people who COMPLEMENT THE NEGATIVES from our stored images from our significant others in early life..........interesting yes ?

That is why we often end up with partners who have similar characteristics to our parents...because from them came, not only the good things...but also the negatives in our psyche...and the negatives, or "less effective" characteristics are what we really, really want to fix, psychologically, when we seek a partner.

Food for thought ??

DavidE

Paul Todd

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RE: Motherly Love? (not 100% serious)
« Reply #6 on: December 01, 2009, 04:20:49 am »
Interesting idea David,
 
I give a bit of credence to all these theory's. They do nothing to explain why I have always loved brown girls though:icon_cheesygrin:, and my Chinese wife looks nothing like my mum! :-/ But I do think my Dad would have fancied her!!!:icon_cheesygrin:

shaun

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RE: Motherly Love? (not 100% serious)
« Reply #7 on: December 01, 2009, 05:18:58 am »
Paul,

Exactly!!!   Peggy does not resemble anyone in my family.  She is the exact opposite of my ex but my father, rest his soul, would have approved and said that's my boy and his beautiful woman.

Shaun

rockycoon

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RE: Motherly Love? (not 100% serious)
« Reply #8 on: December 16, 2009, 01:34:25 am »
Well, I guess I'm a little of both the good and the bad.  I like it when I get mothered, or fussed over (just a little) but I like an opinion that's different than mine, not agreeing all the time, and intelectual argument not yelling.  I'm not sure where this puts me (behind the 8 ball). I also like good looks also. I have a preference on the way they wear their hair. So you figure where that puts me, I'm confused....lol

Offline Willy The Londoner

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RE: Motherly Love? (not 100% serious)
« Reply #9 on: December 16, 2009, 09:05:42 am »
Well I was snookered for a start.  My Mother never had slanty eyes nor was she very slim and (sorry Mum) her cooking was not that great either.

So the nearest resemblance I can get is that they are both women!!!!

Willy

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