Author Topic: Next step!!  (Read 1310 times)

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Offline Canadian Ice

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Next step!!
« on: May 02, 2010, 07:48:09 am »
Hello

I have been writing with this lady for a couple weeks now...about 4 letters...to and 4 back to me.

Things are starting to pick up now ...in the beginning letters we exchanged back ground info on ourselves...families and what not...shes always delighted to hear from me and I her.

I have read through the forums and read lots of what you all have been talking about here and read through the CHLove forums as well.

Kinda scarey sometimes when things do go wrong...like translaters writing the letters...well u know what I mean.

She never comes on too strong...seems sincere if its her I mean...but my question is I would like to step things up a bit...like maybe the Skype...email phone etc. And I would like to ask her for some everyday pics...but I don't want her to feel insulted...she did send me in her second letter a photo of her daughter and it was untouched...just a regular photo.
I have sent her everyday pictures...and included pictures of my family and explained them to her....was kinda hoping she would get the hint.

One thing to note is she did have a video on her profile and her Studio pictures did look like her in the video...I hope everythings real...this talking through a third person thing is sure going to be tough getting through...but I donk think her English is that good...however also in her last letter to me...she says she has bought books and is trying to learn...and she is sure I could teach her as well...more common ground.

Heres an example of what she wrote to me in her last letter...sounds sincere enough like I said:

" Your letter also bring a happy mood to my life at the same time. I like to read your long letters. Of course, it will take me a lot of time to reply to them. I will make sure that I have told all my feeling and what you want to know about me. I don't want to miss any. So I will read your letters for several times. But I am pleased to do it. I like to walk into your life. They take me to visit your life. I have been single for many years. Maybe it is the time for me to fell in love again.
"Now you are the most important friend in my life. I am pleased to share many things with you. "
"To read and reply to your letter just like to talk with you. it makes me feel so close to you. maybe we have to with the translator's help, but it seems that we have a talk with each other face-to-face. I like this feeling and hope this can be lasting."

Where she says of course it will take me along time to reply...she was answering a question I had in my last letter to her ...I told her if she thought I was writing too much I would understand...that I know it would take time to read and write back and I did not want to take up so much of her time.
She answers all my questions...and I am thinking if the translater had that much free time...well I don't know they would be working 24/7

Like I say...her letters to me are just as long as mine are to her.

Maybe am just being cautious I don't know I am quite new to this kind of dating...any advice on this long winded letter of mine here...lol

And I think she may want to step it up a bit as well...as u can see by what she wrote...and i guess I hope I am not overstepping my bounds by sharing some of our personal letters here on the forum...I just really need an opinion....and u all here seem very helpful. Some of u even have married this way....but like I said I am a newb as far as this way of having a relationship.

Thanks

Rick
A wiseman said:
Given two ears & one mouth...we should listen twice as much as we speak!

Offline RobertBfrom aust

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RE: Next step!!
« Reply #1 on: May 02, 2010, 08:56:10 am »
Rick , 1 thing you could ask her if you haven't already is how she receives your emf's and or how far away from the agency she is , this gives you the chance of the next move , as some of the ladies live a distance from their agencies , and may even receive their letters by QQ Mobile , if she lives very close [ it would be a miracle ] you could then ask that when she is ready and at a suitable time for her and the translator to come onto QQ or Yahoo live , that way she would be comfortable .
You could also ask that she receive copies of your original EMF's to help with her English , any notes that you want to send the translator send them as a new paragraph at the bottom of the page , and if things rock along you should be planning a visit within 3-4 months , but as these ladies do not have a lot of time off , I would plan around when she can take holidays , as in the Middle Kingdom it is family first , job second and until you are there you are number 3 , regards Robert .
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Offline Canadian Ice

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RE: Next step!!
« Reply #2 on: May 02, 2010, 03:22:05 pm »
Good advice Robert...thanks

Rick
A wiseman said:
Given two ears & one mouth...we should listen twice as much as we speak!

Arnold

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RE: Next step!!
« Reply #3 on: May 02, 2010, 06:31:46 pm »
Rick , I also want you to feel this Lady seems to be Honest with you and hence she has mentioned the Translator in her Reply ( which if done by them , he would not write or mention him/herself ) I would say .. your are dealing with a " REAL " Lady there . Robert's advice is great , just don't push her too hard on direct contact if she is not ready this soon yet . Do to her English ability . Any Flags come up , you know where to ask . Good Luck .

Offline Canadian Ice

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RE: Next step!!
« Reply #4 on: May 02, 2010, 06:43:36 pm »
Thanks Arnold!

Whats your thoughts on the everyday pictures...like I said her profile pics do look like her in the video...but its kind of nice seeing her everyday ones as well...heck anything would do.
As far as the Skype or telephone I wouldn't care if I didn't understand a word she said...just would be nice to hear her talking....kinda silly ay?

Rick

Another thing...I have made little notes to our translater...very kind words and she has thanked me...we we are getting along great.

So in the end all I can say is this and don't laugh...lol...but...its like this ...if I am writing to the translater... and all the letters she wrote to me are from her...and NOT my Lady...number one She had better be single...good looking...and prepared to marry me if I come all that way to China....nuff said.

Rick
« Last Edit: May 02, 2010, 07:15:02 pm by Canadian Ice »
A wiseman said:
Given two ears & one mouth...we should listen twice as much as we speak!

Arnold

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RE: Next step!!
« Reply #5 on: May 02, 2010, 10:30:50 pm »
Quote from: 'Canadian Ice' pid='37962' dateline='1272840216'

Thanks Arnold!

Whats your thoughts on the everyday pictures...like I said her profile pics do look like her in the video...but its kind of nice seeing her everyday ones as well...heck anything would do.
As far as the Skype or telephone I wouldn't care if I didn't understand a word she said...just would be nice to hear her talking....kinda silly ay?

Rick

Another thing...I have made little notes to our translater...very kind words and she has thanked me...we we are getting along great.

So in the end all I can say is this and don't laugh...lol...but...its like this ...if I am writing to the translater... and all the letters she wrote to me are from her...and NOT my Lady...number one She had better be single...good looking...and prepared to marry me if I come all that way to China....nuff said.

Rick


Rick , about the everyday Pictures . As we explained this before , if the Lady cares for you .. she will do this and many other things for you .. on request . The Skype and Phone , do NOT push . I let my Wife do the first move on that , when SHE was ready . I of course was ready to hear her sweet Voice as soon as possible , but I did give her room and Boy was it worth it when it did finally came to hear it . Heaven , like her Gift's to me were . You are doing the right thing to include the Translator in your writing and get to know her at least a little ,  this way you'll know that it is TWO women your talking to and can separate the two with little problem their after .
 
Regarding the Translator only writing ( which I don't think in your case , by what you showed here ) to you , can happen of course and it has . Of course this would be far from funny for any of us . A note I want to add , is our Translator ( from Gaungzhou ) was fascinated with my Wife's and My romantic writing .. which could have turned that way , but she was already on our Good Friend list of both of us and their was no worry anymore about HER taking over the Relationship from " Us " .

Offline Canadian Ice

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RE: Next step!!
« Reply #6 on: May 03, 2010, 01:59:58 am »
Very nice Arnold....I like what ya said...see am more comfortable now...ok ladies and gents ....gonna be busy for awhile ...I hear luv knockin....=)

Rick
A wiseman said:
Given two ears & one mouth...we should listen twice as much as we speak!

Offline Neil

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RE: Next step!!
« Reply #7 on: May 03, 2010, 02:42:15 am »
I waited about a month before I suggested to Brenda that I phone her.  She replied instantly with her number and was eager and excited to hear my call.  Every time we talk it is the highlight of our week.   I am very very happy that she can speak English.  I could listen to Nina speak Chinese to her friends for hours without understanding much and it was pure heaven, but it bothered her to no end that I couldn't understand her.
...as irresistible as chocolate

Offline Canadian Ice

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RE: Next step!!
« Reply #8 on: May 05, 2010, 04:13:05 am »
Thanks Neil

I have asked her several questions that were brought up in this post...waiting to hear back now!

Rick
A wiseman said:
Given two ears & one mouth...we should listen twice as much as we speak!