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Daily life of a married man

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Rhonald:
Well spoken words of wisdom gents. It is so true that wisdom usually is generated by a hidden sadness. I wonder Max, did your wife ever live in another part of China. My wife grew up from 4 to 20 years old near the Korean border but now has lived 21 years in Shenzhen. Both places in China but different geography. I am hoping that that experience will allow her to adjust to a new change. However the cultural change will be the greater difference then the geographical change.

My parents immigrated to Canada in their mid twenties. My mom says that now Holland feels strange to her and she does not miss it. I think that when people are younger, the adjustment is not as shocking.

maxx:
Michael the hardest part was getting the birth certificate.You have to have the real deal.To get the passport.The one that the hospitol issues you cannot use.It took almost 3 months.To get everything to gether get the passport and then get the visa.You have to have all the baby shots completed.

Rhonald my wife was born in JiuJiang.After college she lived for about 3 years in Shenyang.then 2 years in Shenzen.And 5 years in Zhuhai

David5o:
Homesick.....

This is one problem that i have not experienced with Lucy to date. But then she does go home every 6 months to visit her parents that are both getting on in years now.  She normally stays for 3 to 4 weeks, and that makes her happy, her parents happy, and me happy ...haha!!  She also has a long list of things to bring back, from Chinese herbal medicines to shorts and t-shirts (who has never used ''prickly heat talcum powder''?haha!)

She has often said to me that she doesn't get and isn't homesick, but she doe like to visit her parents, and siblings as they are, after all a very close family. I've asked her, what about after your parents have passed away? She said that, maybe go back to see them, (siblings/family) maybe once every 1 or 2 years is OK...

I've never heard her complain about missing anything in China so far... She does love the life here, and her work keeps her mind busy, i suppose we'll just have to wait and see if anything changes as time goes on.

Actually, i'm picking her up from the airport later on tonight from a trip home, and we'll both be going back together again, early in the new year. I guess as far as we are both conserned, life at the moment is just Great for both of us!!


David......

maxx:
Kids.

Last couple of days they have ben a number of posts on how to deal with the kids from a previose marraige.I Don't think there is a easy answer.Except maybe shipping the kids off to boarding schools on the other side of the country.If you do that all your doing is causing more hard feelings.And nothing ever gets settled.

I have 2 kids from a previose marraige.A girl who is 17 and a boy who is 16.My kids don't seem to have a problem with me being married to A Chinese women. they only see her once a year.For a couple of weeks.So it ussualy isn't a problem for me.

That was until my daughter stayed with us for the summer.As far as my wife was concerned it was the end of civilization as we know it.I wasn't getting any peace.At any point and time.If I wasn't getting it from the wife I was getting it from my daughter.It would get so bad all I wanted to do was stay at work.

I had told my daughter when I went to get her to not cause any problems in my house.And i told my wife that my daughter was only going to stay for a couple of months.Every day I would come home from work and they would be just giving each other bad looks.Wouldn't say anything to each other wouldn't do nothing together.

If my daughter did something my wife didn't like.I would hear about it when I got home.So I thought I would start takeing my daughter to work with me to give my wife a break from my daughter.It worked to a certain point until We would get back home from work.Then the dirty looks would start all over again.

I asked my wife what was my daughter doing to make her so angry.My wife said that no Chinese girl would act or talk like my daughter did to there parents.My daughter is having teenage anxed.She has got a boyfriend.That neither My exwife or I like.So she is rebeling.

If Grandma hadn't said anything about the boyfriend I'm sure my daughter would of kicked him to the curb.He is more Drama then my daughter is.But since her grandmother said something about the boy she is acting up.

I finally had to set both my wife and daughter down and tell them this was how it was going to be for another month.It seemd to calm down alot.Neither one was happy but I got some piece.

They were having a culture clash.And a battle of wills.And it was going to continue untill.I delt with the problem head on.

Peter:
In some way I must say that I am happy to not have your situation Max. My daughter is 26 and I have one grandson and she have another baby on the way next month. She have gone through her fathers marriages once before when I got married to a woman from Ukraine 10 years ago. I know that she can deal with this new situation because she is a very gentile woman, just like my wife. I doubt that there would be a problem with Tina's daughter because she is a very nice girl so I must say that I am a very lucky man..

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