China Romance
General Discussion and Useful Links => The Campfire => Topic started by: Martin on May 02, 2014, 07:08:37 pm
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clearly, there are some problems with the site. I want people to be completely honest, and write down here what the problems are.we are always striving to make the site better, so any input is appreciated.if you have a problem with the site layout, how people are acting, how things operate, I want to know. Nothing will be edited or deleted from this thread.
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The problem is my woman...
She is so danged interesting that I barely have a moment of time to come here and read, much less post.
I suspect that we all share this same problem... :D
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I dont have any particular issues with the layout or the format...that's just cosmetic.
It seems that we have somehow lost the ability to attract new members ..or we have many new poeple who come here for info but dont post and share their experiences.
We must not forget that within our existing data-base on the Site, are the answers to just about every question everybody needs to know about finding and "importing" a Chinese partner.
It maybe that the economic climate has slowed the rate of "exploration" of Chinese Brides, or the reality of the cost/complexity is better understood, keeping "players" out of the loop.
As an "old hand" I am not so sure what members and/or newbies want from me now. I am happy to get involved in any questions, issues and debates as are all of our "old" members, but it is not easy to glean what is needed from us.
I am not sure if a blow-by-blow account of my normal daily life with my lovely Chinese Bride is of riveting excitement that would have old hands and newbies spellbound !!!!!! We have settled into a normal life together, and if there are items of specific interest (in my case the Religion saga and the introduction of the Little Emperor), then I post for general interest.
Other than that...what do newbies and oldies think I (and others) should be doing for communication ????.....I would be happy to know
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The only problem I have with the site is that sometime I make a reply and I get no interface above this box, such as this time, where I can change fonts etc or add smileys. So sometimes people take some of my comments seriously!!!!
The fact that there is no shout box has never been a problem for me.
It is because I work on the internet all day that I can regularly shoot over here to see if there is anything new. Others cannot do that they have to go to work.
I cannot remember when I last had a item deleted on here.
I also look in on the 'other site' and often it goes several weeks before a new posting is made and and as Maxx has found, some made there are a load of tosh and replies sents in response do not get through the moderators deletion button.
I do not think that there is much wrong with this site in general I just think that there are far fewer men looking to Asia and China in particular for serious relationships.
Willy
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I'm going to think on that a day or 2 and reply.
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Willy, I have the same problem. sometimes the box is there and sometimes it isn't . Don't know why yet.
I am not real happy with whoever is deleting posts. I suspect it was a mod trying to clean up my thread from posts that did not belong. But I lost some of the early posts that I made and some success stories.
So whoever is doing it please be a bit more selective instead of deleting everything.
As far as the heated discussion that occurred on my thread about the private VIP area. I think it is healthy to clear the air and voice your opinions. I just wish it hadn't occurred in my thread. I hope no one leaves because they disagree with this point alone.
I am not above bickering. I think I have had a run-in with other members a couple of times but I joined knowing the mission of the site and I also knew that it was not mine. The mods had the authority to do what they want whether I agreed or not. If I cant bear it then I will voice my opinion and then continue until apprehended. It is what it is.. (or was) so lets petition for change and move on.
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I am aware of the situation, and Mike knows I am dealing with it.
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I am aware of the situation, and Mike knows I am dealing with it.
This little scenario would have to give rise to a gripe...surely.
For those of us mushrooms out here who only can see the tip of this particular iceberg, it seems incomprehensible that ANYBODY could have the approval/authority/permission...be it Moderator or simply a Member...to delete Mikes Posts en-masse...and to delete his account also.
As one of the pillars of rectitude and support for this Forum, Mike should NOT be subject to this and seems to have every right to be incensed.
But of course...as usual we are not told the full story...if it is an accident...tell us. If it is a deliberate act...tell us..and name and shame the perpetrator....lets cut out some of this secrecy stuff...tell us as it is.
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unfortunately, I am at work right now. I am driving a truck up north. So when I say I am trying to get to the bottom of it, keep in mind that I am driving.if mike wants to say what's going on, he can.
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It isn't no great mystery, Who done it, it was me. He said he was done so I took down his account. Now he is back whining. Am I supposed to be a mind reader. Am I supposed to have a crystal ball and look into it.If so nobody told me that was in the job description. This is the only guy who said he was leaving. Then comes back 6 hours latter and says who took down my account. If you don't want your account deleted don't post it on here.that you are leaving.Mind reading 101 is not my thing.
As far as deleted post,Or modified posts.Yes it was me again.The post was belitteling to somebody. Or the guy couldn't take a joke .And had posted back something nasty to somebody. If you guys don't like the job I do fine. You do the job I can have it arranged.
Gerry the reason I busted the ladies profile off of the thread was because with all the back biting and stabbing going on here lately,It didn't shine any light on the lady.She was not the center of attention the way she should of been. So I moved the post. To give her a much better chance of shinning through. I'm sorry your other posts didn't get moved. But with my limited access. I couldn't move your other posts. Perhaps the next moderator Martin chooses will have more and better access. And could grant your request.
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Yes, I have limited the access while I try to figure out what the heck is going on here. Thats my job...to oversee everything. Yes, Mike said he was done, but Mike was also angry at the time. I could see that plainly. The thought to delete his account never crossed my mind. We have a lot of members that have left us...told us they were leaving, and we never deleted their accounts. That decision was Mike's to make...either to delete it, specifically ask us to delete it, or leave it should he wish to return later.
Our job isnt to take things personally. There have been members here in the past I would have loved to delete, but didnt. There has to be a better way than this.
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W T F is going on today? I wake up to find that WW3 is well under way!
When Scottish Rob wakes up I am sure that he will be over there to knock a few knees together.
Willy
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I'm thinkin...there should be some kind of method to allow members to decide what needs to be deleted. One man with his own subjective opinion or interpretation may flaw the poster's true intent.
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Fivetrout you have a good idea, The problem is it doesn't work. Because of human nature I guess you would call it. I belong to three other forums. Where I'm not a mod. That deal with the subject of boats. That are really heavelly moderated. And they are the same way, they go way off track. They go so far off track there has been a couple of death threats. It got so bad on one of the forums I belong to. That they shut down the forum for 6 months. And pressed charges against the guy making the threats.
When they re launched after six months they had sold the forum and replaced all the mods. And you had to be a super exclusive member from the old forum to join the new forum. So you ended up with the same people posting the same things. And no new ideas or information was being passed. So it got to be a drag and I left until they opened it back up. and got some new blood and new ideas. Now as far as boats go it is a rocking forum. That is heavely moderated. Where any desertion from any idea outside of a boat the member is banned. You don't make jokes, you don't try to be little somebody. And you don't post anything that hasn't got to do with boats. It still runs off course for a couple of days until the mods get it fixed. And they ban the offending party.
When we moved from facebook to here the idea was the same. Just run the forum don't take any lip service. Make it a enjoyable experience for all. Well it ran off track. And when we tried to fix it, I was the one getting threatened. So I just let it go until I couldn't take anymore threats and bulling. When I put a stop to it this is what happened what you see here. And with management turning tale and running, This is where it is at now.
I Really hope Martin can find a new moderator and they can get this fixed. (Yes I've turned in my resignation)this forum still has allot to offer to the guys going through this.
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Ok WTF is going on???
I just read hrough this and wondered what has gone wrong. people come here to get information from 'us' oldies...(although I'm not sure I can give out as much info now)
Personally I dont post as much since my last forey into the middle kingdom after what happenend...But I think 2 things (1) Not as many people come here and asking questions and (2) maybe it has 'run' its course?
I am NOT TAKING sids here) but Mike (mpo) did say he was leaving!! and Max was quick of the mark in deleting Mikes account...We cannot blame any of them nor can blame be given from either one to the other one....(I think thats right? ::) ::) :-\
(A)Mike seemed angry...
(B) Max wanted to get the site cleaned up asap.
I am no expert but I have seen this coming for the last year. >:(
Everthing Runs its course maybe we have done that we were lucky that the early years many of the guys went to China and came back and posted their adventures..
I don't know what we can do to get back to that way IF that''s what the forum members want to do. but if indeed we do rstart can we PLEASE have a chat box? ;D ;D ;D
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"Opinions are like assholes. Everybody has one and most of them stink."
It's like waiting for a London bus in here. The forum stumbles along quietly without a hint of drama or excitement for months, then suddenly we get drama after drama.
Like David E. , I'm not sure my happily married life is anything anyone here is really interested in. I encounter some interesting stuff here in China, but can't really add much more to the dating advice than is already here, or to the legal stuff, because we have our own resident expert. This forum is more like an archive + occasional chat between guys who have shared similar journeys in the past.
Has the boat sailed? Maybe, but I still enjoy coming here, partly for nostalgic reasons, or on the off-chance I might be able to help someone, or they might be able to help me.
For what it's worth, Maxx, I'm going to thoroughly lick your boots and say that I think the moderators do a damn fine job. I can't quite work out what all the fuss was about - seems like a storm in a teacup.
Can't we just all take the 5th, or observe the 24 hour rule, or count to ten, or something?
Or maybe this forum needs a bit of shaking up once in a while, to keep things interesting :)
btw I hope that Mike stays around. I have always thought he made some excellent contributions to this forum, and have certainly never been offended by anything he said.
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have to agree with Philip..” I think the moderators do a damn fine job.”
In my opinion, the mod's do an exemplary job keeping this site afloat. If anyone wants to visit
a graveyard, go visit the forum on ChnLove. Michael, "China Shark", has single handily kept that
thing from sinking into oblivion. A few here did not accept his somewhat abrasive ways, but lets
face it, we have a few vociferous members here. In the least, Mike does have China pedigree.
There is little substance on that site forum nowadays. Without the 'Shark', what gives it life?
It is unfortunate that a few of the older members have left. The few new have taken their place.
Maybe the “site subject”, i.e. China woman, has matured. That should be the question that faces
us; likewise, maybe it is time to for 'mod' change. Maxx has entered his resignation. He is burnt toast.
Maxx has performed in an efficient manner, but a few here have questioned his 'professional' conduct.
I have a question, do the mod's receive any considerations for their services? Just out of curiosity I ask.
If there is a lopping of mod's heads, then by all means it behooves us to recommend a few
members to the exalted..the elevated status of 'site mod'. Of course Martin has the final say,
but a little help would ease the burden.
If it comes to recos, I do nominate “Mike”, aka mpo. He has a history of substance abundance here.
So why not 'Mike the Mod'?
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Scottish Rob, in regards to the Shoutbox, when Irish man give up the site, it was moved to a new server. I don't know if the new server, or the updated version of SMF won't allow for the Shoutbox.that is why it is not here.
As far as considerations or compensation for the mods, they get 10% of the generated site income. To date, that income has been 0.
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"they get 10% of the generated site income. To date, that income has been 0."
Martin, I figured as much. It is a thankless job.
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Ok Thanks Martin ::) ::) ::) :( :( :(
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As far as considerations or compensation for the mods, they get 10% of the generated site income. To date, that income has been 0.
And this is how Martin fooled me into becoming a MOD. He said that I would get a lot of LOVE from this site for compensation. So I though I would get frequent visits from escorts for massages, and only needed to worry about some of them being ladyboys. But when Martin told me about compensation, he was meaning tennis as in the French Open as in “l’oeuf”. A big fat ZERO.
As of late, with too many toes stepped on, I wish that emotions will settle down. Sure feelings were hurt, but I hope thicker skin will prevail. There is, as I see, no correct solution to help with this site's evolution. As a MOD, our job is but just to manage the pollution. Sometimes, the wrong things get cleaned up and or edited.
As a previous soccer ref, I know how sometimes spectators and players can get under your skin and cause you to make momentarily bad calls. I have done it, as it is always hard to control biasism.
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Phew !!!
I just wonder if there is any hope for us on the Site......
Having witnessed this bitter exchange between 2 of the most Senior, knowleagable and respected Bros it is a sad commentary on where we are at.
Maxx...you were always a tough hombre....but that was Maxx...we accepted it, lived it and had a watchful eye on your terse, relevant and inciteful Moderation of our (sometimes) wayward missives....even though your spelling and Grammar made me wince ;D ;D
Mike...the voice of calm and reason.......deeply religious and committed, full of actual knowlege about the Chinese Bride adventure....heck, you even tolerated a heathen like me without rancour or judgement. ;D ;D
Now, to see the pair of you cutting each others throats is sad indeed.
And we used to have pride in referring to members here as "Bros"
WHAT in Hell happened to all that history, HOW in Hell did we get to this place. ??????????????????
More importantly...HOW IN HELL do we undo this mess and get back to where we were ???????????????
I cant for the life of me recall the incidents that gave rise to this state of affairs, I dont recall any issues bad enough to lead down this track...but maybe I missed something.
Guys...surely we are bigger than this.
ps...Rhonald
"Biasism"...!!!!!!! No such word...as our resident wordsmith, you cant do this........not permitted. :-\
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It's official I have resigned. from being a mod. I'm just one of the guys now. And it feels just fine. For those of you who pm me and offered there support .Or those who posted there support here. I do appreciate it. Good luck and best wishes. I will still be around to offer my advice and support.
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I'm with you Davied E I think I may have missed something as well...That was so UNLIKE Mike to comee away with stuff like that. :( :( :( :( :( :(
i woud like to see this site returned to the way it was .......... as a BROTHERHOOD. ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ???
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Just dang!!! :o 8)
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Well as they say 'things happen". I for one thought Maxx offered a lot over the years and helped people who came on here. I enjoyed the knowledge , opinions and of course the spelling at times along with the grammar.
Whoever takes his place I hope has the wisdom knowledge and experience that he had. And I am sure we will still hear from him at times.
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So far I don't see it. Someone trying to do a job and occasionally it is not to the liking of someone else. Then the argument ensues. For what ever reason there is a feud taking place. But it is being played out on a public forum.
There are no opinions, only arguments. I don't have an opinion and I hate to argue. So I dont like the current state of affairs here.
But I like to listen to new and refreshing ideas. I like to see someone do something to help the brotherhood and the newbies. After all that is what I believe to be the mission statement of why this forum exist (correct me if I am wrong).
If this forum is going to continue (and I sometimes have my doubts) we need to put some thought into what could improve it. Not nuke it because of an argument. Analyze why the membership is falling and why at times the forum is a ghost town without new posts for days. How can we encourage new membership? Maybe the answer is the forum has outlived its purpose and mission and the times are not right for it to continue. Maybe it needs to be put to sleep and maybe resurrected someday, rather than suffering through a slow death.
I for one think there is still value in this forum. I enjoy coming here and finding the occasional update or new experience that someone has shared. I don't contribute as much as I did in the past. The reason being that my campaign has finished. But I still like to come here to share some tidbit of my life or introduce a new lady I find interesting. So for me this forum still has some value although it is different than before.
One often contradicts an opinion when what is uncongenial is really the tone in which it was conveyed.
Friedrich Nietzsche
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ps...Rhonald
"Biasism"...!!!!!!! No such word...as our resident wordsmith, you cant do this........not permitted. :-\
Sorry - I forgot the "-" as in Bias - ism!
ism - Ism is a derived word used in philosophy, politics, religion or other areas pertaining to an ideology of some sort, sometimes with a derogatory sense.
Bias is an inclination of temperament or outlook to present or hold a partial perspective, often accompanied by a refusal to even consider the possible merits of alternative points of view.
I tried to merge two deep meaning words to state in the complex, that which is simple - He is wrong, I am right - definition.
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I tried to merge two deep meaning words to state in the complex, that which is simple - He is wrong, I am right - definition.
Webster is spinning... ;D apparently so is Dave. ::)
I think what has happened had to happen and things will improve. I find that I don't have a lot of time to come here and then when I do and I post something I am negligent in responding and then days go by and a response seems belated.
I am still in the process so the forum is valuable to me. I don't know how I feel when the process has completed. I guess we'll see.
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Gerry, Gerry, Gerry,
“How about a few blogs? How about some news articles?
Invite a guests to talk about their experience in the blog.”
As Ted posted “Issues with the forum”... 'but many members chimed in. The forum was fun,exciting,
and informative. It had that edge that made it different from other forums'.
I think you're on to something.. this thread is static, not as lively as a few years back. In a nanosecond or
two I usually am gone; invariably, I hit the blogs. I whet my appetite in the blogs for China stuff of interest.
Most “blog related" sites are usually current, up- to- date. Lots of good stuff to keep an interest. Maybe, most importantly,
there is no 'gamesmanship', in- your- face retaliatory posting. I mean, who needs that shit?
Probably most here read the blogs. For the uninitiated, it would be a great source of information, maybe newsworthy enough
to be of mention here. Get the blood flowing again.
(I say it, after Maxx's character assassination, there are a few child like nonsensical postings. WTF! Is this the future here?)
I think a host of blogs could be posted under “General Discussion & Useful Links” allowing the membership easy access
for review & maybe some 'adult like' thought provoking comments.
A few of mention,
http://www.pekingduck.org/
http://middlekingdomlife.com/guide/
http://www.expatexchange.com/china/liveinchina.html
http://community.travelchinaguide.com/forum.asp
http://laowaiblog.com/
http://www.happierabroad.com/
https://yoyochinese.com/blog
& of course, our very own Arnold's http://www.shmifeng.blogspot.com/
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Hello people,
I seen an email that wanted opinions. I will give a fact instead of opinion on one thing...Things have changed much since the facebook days. Perhaps the interest in finding a woman from China has lost it's appeal. It seems when I found Chnlove there were many others that had that same interest. There will always be men that are interested in meeting a lady in China but your not seeing this in either forum.
As I read this thread I seen some issues with a couple people. That actually helps activity in forums...differences in opinions! We all go thru different experiences with doing this venture. My first experience, with this adventure, didn't turn out the way I "expected"(the biggest curse in doing this venture...expectations) it to. Surprises happen or should I say the other "s" word? Maxx was helpful when I was there in China dealing with this. He had experience! The other Max was also helpful(does anybody remember him from the facebook days?). Here is a link to his success with Chnlove: http://chnlove.com/t_matches/detail2_724_2.html
What made this forum and the facebook page good was the quick responses to questions we wanted answered yesterday(we all know how long it took Chnlove forum to post). The interest is just not there anymore. Those that say it's ran it's course are probably correct.
My wife and I just returned from Changsha. We spent a little time travelling(fun doing the tourist thing). We met up with CS Mike. We chatted about our experiences in China and on these forums. We also had a good laugh! A very nice man with strong opinions. I feel those kinds of opinions bring interest and other opinions to a forum table. <---this being my opinion! ;) Another opinion I have is an overly moderated forum can also drain interest. This is from my own personal experience with running a gaming forum 10 years ago. Forums can have a tendency to get on the "banned wagon" and this will have that negative effect! Good luck with the differences and keeping this forum alive!
My wife and I wish everybody on this forum happiness in their ventures!
Jim
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Happy or Jim there are a few here that miss you. It is good to see the occasional post.
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Maybe it is time to revamp the site.
As it is a free site then I wonder how money can be forthcoming to have SEO's working on it. Bearing in mind a lot of the SEO offering their service are on the same lines as dating scammers. Getting the opening page is right, some people overdo the number of words in the hidden headings but 25 well scripted phrases is best. And these same words need to be in the opening page and or other pages.
What is needed is an opening page that leads to the revamped forum.
I think Gerry is right in one way, the site needs to be more active. Blogs are a good way as long as they are updated regularly. The major search engines love finding updated items. Going back to Facebook and utilising what is there is another and also Twitter.
After seeing that the other chnlove forum goes a couple of weeks sometime without any new entries then I came to the conclusion that Finding a Chinese wife was no longer what it used to be. I even stopped posting controversial items that were only designed to get some activity on here. ;D ;D ;D
Maybe it is time to revamp the mods as well. Even the US President only gets 4 years unless her is re-elected for a second term.
It is noted that now, with the departure of the esteemed Global Moderator, there are now only two mods who visit regularly. From the record available it showsthe other was last active nearly two months ago.
Maybe two mods and the administrator is all we need at this time.
Maybe we should rename the site and open it to all who are looking for a foreign wife. A lot of the info that we available from our own experiences would be suitable in many cases to relationships with other than just chinese ladies. I do know that some on here have given up on finding a Chinese Wife and have gone to other countries to fulfill their needs. ::)
The UK has now opened it borders to nearly 30 European countries now, that has made marriages a lot easier but no doubt the persons from the EU countries need green cards for the USA etc.
My vote would be to open the forum to men looking to marry a foreign wife. Period. There are now many years experience in terms of marriage years amongst us. Ok but lets glean then info from others who have or are looking to other countries. I am sure that the experience of Robertt is not just restricted to US/chinese relationships.
The choice really is simple. Revamp the forum or let it suffer a lingering death.
Let us have some positive ideas come in.
Willy
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Seems we now have 2 threads to talk about new ideas.
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there is no need of the perfect woman in the flesh.
OUR problem is the marketplace.
leave it to the Japanese to model the perfect artificial woman...the Americans to bring it to the
marketplace. BUT, big BUTT, there may be unforeseen issues arising on the unsuspecting horny male.
iBabe scene from "Movie 43"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRGnqH7nkow
still, it is the Japanese that started this whole thing, The Perfect Woman.
Chi (Chobits)
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chi_(Chobits)
see "Discovery"
She is found by Hideki one night in a pile of trash as he makes his way home from work. He takes her to his
apartment and tries to figure out how to activate her. A typical persocom (abbreviated from "personal computer")
has its power switch in or behind its ears, but Chi's is located in a very unorthodox place: her crotch. Realizing this,
Hideki overcomes his moral objections and manages to activate her. She has difficulty communicating with him at
first; the only word that she is able to say being "chi", but slowly she learns how to speak. She is initially fearful
that Hideki will discard her because of this, but he reassures her that he would never throw her away. When Hideki
decides to give her a name, he remembers the only word that she can say and decides to call her "Chi".
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my opinion had a brain fart. so I respectfully rescind my reco.
If it comes to recos, I do nominate “Mike”, aka mpo. He has a history of substance abundance here.
So why not 'Mike the Mod'?
too much drama.
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my opinion had a brain fart. so I respectfully rescind my reco.
If it comes to recos, I do nominate “Mike”, aka mpo. He has a history of substance abundance here.
So why not 'Mike the Mod'?
too much drama.
Unfortunately the very recent spat that resulted in another resigning as a mod will be something that would have to be considered.
We had a similar situation a few years back when a spat took place between a mod and a member with the result that the one who replaced him as a mod left the forum and has not been back since.
Willy
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Actually, if I may intercede...he actually announced on this thread that he quit, and I clicked the necesary buttons to grant his wish. Prior to that, I had taken some of his abilities that he had away while I tried to figure out a solution.
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Wish it woud it is becoming tedious!!!
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The Rites of Spring, a part from the book "Rites of Spring: The Great War and the Birth of the Modern Age"
It saddens me to see this mud slinging, and as in spring time with spring cleaning, I will lay out my plan. I can see Mike is upset at past injustice - Mike I am sorry. Maxx I can see you are upset at current injustice - Maxx I am sorry. But just as in the Rites of Spring with two squawking birdies in their nest, chirpping loudly to claim the worm - Pick Me Pick Me - and as Robbie so elegantly said...it is becoming tedious.
This so called Great War of Words will have no right nor no wrong and it just hurts our forum - we all become losers. I have talked with Martin the possibility of just closing this forum down totally. For me, the only real winner I can see of this feud is he who first decides to not respond to the other. Bait not taken keeps the animal out of the trap.
With the Rites of Spring I will go forth and when I see any posts that either hint at the other, I shall sweep it clean.
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I am just sweeping away the last few days of feuding posts and any further ones. Links to past posts are trying to draw attention to past wrong doings. This is not a court of law, and I hope I am not Judge Dredd. It is not about who is right or wrong - that path will have no winners. It is about survival for this forum. I admit my method might be draconian. And if enough members do not like my method, then I will abort my spring cleaning.
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Why don't you just delete this whole thread? It does absolutely no good and leaves a bad impression on the forum as a whole. Just my thoughts.
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Mike...You have had your say on whats happened to you.
.Maxx you have answered it..
Why don't the pair of you NOW put htis to bed and end it as Rhonald said..All this fighting and arguing/mud slinging/etc etc will hurt this forum...I have a question to you both "IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?..
Maybe the only way left is to neither of you to post when the other one does, as the thread is named OPINIONS, let one or both of you keep them to yourself when the other person posts!!!
I can see this forum closing and I don't think it's fair to do that as a resut of 2 members mud slinging at each other...
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MY OPINION!
I thought that this thread was started as a way of finding out how the forum could be improved and in order to get opinions that this referring to the layout, contents etc.
This thread has certainly moved away from that and having read the original posting by the administrator I feel that what has actually occurred was probably caused by the words used in that original posting!
Ok what is going on between Mike and Maxx are opinions, whether right or wrong, I take no sides. BUT this spat has completely taken away what I considered the purpose of that original posting. Which was as members how can we improve things.
Let this thread be a place where people can voice personal opinions whether we agree with them or not. Let the individuals concerned argue their points, I have no idea how, what, when and why it started. That is between the two concerned.
What I am concerned with is This Forum! How to make improvements, how to bring the knowledge we have collectively acquired over the years to anyone starting off on what was and is the journey of a lifetime.
I have started a new thread which is just for the purpose most of us intended the original thread was for but which are now lost amongst the to and for opinions. I have reproduced my original postings into this new thread and ask others to do the same.
I have named it Improvement Ideas and it is intended to be just for the layout, future contents etc and not for opinions on individuals. This is intended just for that purpose and I ask the mods to freely remove any posting that does not confirm to the spirit of the thread.
Willy
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Mike do you read what I posted? I said I would delete posts that you or Maxx aim at each other. I will not delete this or the previous 2 posts here.
You are allowed to post a questions, but just keep it away from trying to establish a court case. My actions are just as similar as a referee in sports - I make the call, sometimes I will make a bad call, but I will make the call. You know the rules and unsportsman like conduct is a call I will make. I will not ban you directly, but if either you or Maxx keep going at each other throats, I think it wise to let the other members make the call. Not on who is right or wrong, but if a red card needs to be shown.
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Mike, I have played sports and I have refeered sports, sometimes bad calls are made and either you sulk or suck it up and play on. The team is more important then the individual. The posts I deleted 3 from Maxx & 4 from you was in my opinoin low blows. All I can say if you did not agree with some of my deletions is to say I am sorry.
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When you throw red cards , I want to know why
It will not be me who decides if a ban - red card is made - I do not have that power. But Mike, do you not think that if enough members start grumbling, action will take place? I hope you see that I am not name calling or talking down. I am not cursing. I do not have the ability to right any wRONgs - eventhough I have been placed into the middle of the wRONg doings. I am just the janitor cleaning up the mess.
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Time to call it a day boys! Grab a beer...and toast to the Chinese woman!
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Mike
If you dont let go of this you are going to lose many friends.
Speaking purely for myself, I have had enough of this stuff.
If you want to single-handedly wreck what is left of a noble and worthy venture, you are doing well so far.
For folks looking in , we must present a very pathetic image about now.
Enough is enough
Thank you in anticipation
DavidE
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Yesterday I surfed this site and managed to stumble on a post of maybe 5 years ago. I think it had to do with
the transition from facebook. Anyway, I am unable to find it now! That was a lot of great information. I note there
was some kind of 'point' system established for infractions of sorts that were not relative to the intent of this website.
I think I am correct in saying this. Please advise if I am incorrect. (It is noteworthy that Maxx was the 'Global Mod' then. Long time.)
So, it got me to thinking about the latest incident. Most unfortunate.
To begin, the Mods do a lot of good (should) to keep the site functional ... fun & informative. Since this is not a 'pay-for-membership'
forum, why should a mod be vulnerable to any of the general membership? They don't need that shit. If a member has that kind of
life or death influence of an existing mod, then the resulting instability undermines everything else, actually all other things worthy of mention.
Maxx stated that he culled a few dubious posts. Was this not his duty as a mod? For 5 years this guy performed an admirable but thankless
job, doing what he thought best for all the members. And his ass got poached for this latest debacle? Resulting in his resignation.
Because of one relentless pissy, pissy member. Inexcusable.
The forum needs to refine it's structure. Discipline. Order. Immediate corrective action to counter any instabilities. I mean does
anyone still believe in good forum stewardship? The membership is across the globe. Everyone is different, the only common
element shared, the China woman. Religion & politics can be contentious. What I think, what others think, does not necessarily
correlate common thought. But the one determining factor that is a constant anywhere, is good citizenship. We owe it to ourselves
& others to behave decently.
Maybe it behooves Martin & his merry band of mods, in their self imposed diminished capacity, to recreate another 'point system'
for questionable or outlandish behavior of any member. Like bounce it back & forth with the other mod's. Then if an infraction occurs,
deal with it immediately, first with a warning & the reasons why. The mods decide as one.
At least be decisive instead of condescending.
Maybe this helps.
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JohnB
Excellent post.....right on the money ;D ;D
I well remember the merit points system...and was sad when it was disbanded.
Of course, such a reward system has got to be a little difficult to manage and police because there is a lot of subjective judgement involved by the Mods who operate it and the individual perceptions of the people who sponsored such "awards". But nevertheless, we seemed overall to have got it right most of the time and I know for myself I was always very chuffed if and when someone rarely gave me a "Brownie Point " !!!
There is always a lot of merit in a Mod acting decisively and positively to keep the Forum on track, however many noses get out of joint....if we have weak moderation, then we have anarchy...as we have just seen.
I believe that Maxx's departure is a backward step for us, he was truly an Icon in the Grand Scheme of things...we need such Icons !!!!!!!!!!
Maxx would always be relied upon to offer some wisdom in any situation...and his spelling and grammar (which I mostly believe was a trade-mark, not a reality) kept a Maxx post to almost always have some weight. Same as Martin and Ron, who each had their own styles to deal with us all especially when we transgressed.......Martin as the Referee, Ron as the immaculate and logical Wordsmith.
Now we lose all that History and precedent and sail on into uncharted waters.....will we regret the last weeks ??...sure we will. Will we move on to bigger and better things ???...dunno !!
And tyhe worst bit of all is that I still have no idea what exactly caused this current explosion...and I read all the posts every day.
To say I am confused is an understatement...................
I will just have to open a few dozen coldies while I try to work it all out.....(The Aus Tourist Commission tells me I can no longer throw another shrimp on the Barbie...its not cultured enough )...go figure.
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JohnB
Excellent post.....right on the money ;D ;D
I well remember the merit points system...and was sad when it was disbanded.
Of course, such a reward system has got to be a little difficult to manage and police because there is a lot of subjective judgement involved by the Mods who operate it and the individual perceptions of the people who sponsored such "awards". But nevertheless, we seemed overall to have got it right most of the time and I know for myself I was always very chuffed if and when someone rarely gave me a "Brownie Point " !!!
There is always a lot of merit in a Mod acting decisively and positively to keep the Forum on track, however many noses get out of joint....if we have weak moderation, then we have anarchy...as we have just seen.
I believe that Maxx's departure is a backward step for us, he was truly an Icon in the Grand Scheme of things...we need such Icons !!!!!!!!!!
Maxx would always be relied upon to offer some wisdom in any situation...and his spelling and grammar (which I mostly believe was a trade-mark, not a reality) kept a Maxx post to almost always have some weight. Same as Martin and Ron, who each had their own styles to deal with us all especially when we transgressed.......Martin as the Referee, Ron as the immaculate and logical Wordsmith.
Now we lose all that History and precedent and sail on into uncharted waters.....will we regret the last weeks ??...sure we will. Will we move on to bigger and better things ??? ...dunno !!
And tyhe worst bit of all is that I still have no idea what exactly caused this current explosion...and I read all the posts every day.
To say I am confused is an understatement...................
I will just have to open a few dozen coldies while I try to work it all out.....(The Aus Tourist Commission tells me I can no longer throw another shrimp on the Barbie...its not cultured enough )...go figure.
David E
I agree with you very much about liking the " brownie points " :D
The " Reputation " aka brownie point system is actually a good system that serves 2 purposes when used correctly. First and foremost, it gives newbies (new members ) an idea about the knowledge or experience levels of the poster, which assists them in deciding if the poster's advice or information can be considered valid. Second and also just as important, it gives the poster who donates their time and energy which could have been spent elsewhere some type of reward or token for their contributions. The previous system we had was set up to fail because reputation points are rewards and should NEVER be allowed to be used as penalties or black marks to punish or de-rate a poster's contribution because you do not like them or do not agree with their post. I contribute to other forums that use reputation points and their systems are set up so that reputation points can only be added and never subtracted by other members. This method gives members a small incentive to actually post useful and knowledge rich information and add quality to the site since people will begin posting better quality information or articles trying to boost their reputation points. There should a method so you can set the points to be accumulative only so they can not be deducted as a means to strike out at the poster by members they may have chaffed. The reputation points should also be set so that only members can award points and members can not award points to themselves. The reputation system actually is a very good system for newbies and experienced members because it aids newbies and rewards experienced members for their participation here in the forums. Hopefully our forum will recover and move on into the future. I firmly believe that once the global recession is over people will again need our knowledge when they begin their journey beyond " The Great Wall "
Regards, Robertt
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So, it got me to thinking about the latest incident. Most unfortunate
To begin, the Mods do a lot of good (should) to keep the site functional ... fun & informative. Since this is not a 'pay-for-membership'
forum, why should a mod be vulnerable to any of the general membership? They don't need that shit. If a member has that kind of
life or death influence of an existing mod, then the resulting instability undermines everything else, actually all other things worthy of mention.
Maxx stated that he culled a few dubious posts. Was this not his duty as a mod? For 5 years this guy performed an admirable but thankless
job, doing what he thought best for all the members. And his ass got poached for this latest debacle? Resulting in his resignation.
Because of one relentless pissy, pissy member. Inexcusable.
JohnB,
Well said as I think Maxx should be reinstated back into the Mod ranks. Any others think that he should be reinstated?
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Maxx stated that he culled a few dubious posts. Was this not his duty as a mod? For 5 years this guy performed an admirable but thankless
job, doing what he thought best for all the members. And his ass got poached for this latest debacle? Resulting in his resignation.
Because of one relentless pissy, pissy member. Inexcusable.
....TWEET.....
I posted here to Mike that this was not a court of Law, but now I see that I need to also defend some of his actions.
I pm messaged Maxx before that although I supported him, I also have to be impartial.
Yes I felt that Mike held on too long to a grudge, but the one recent post of his here, referring to a previous action by Maxx last year, that I had deleted, has a justifiable concern. So please all gents here, do not start name calling.
What has happened here now, has had a very similar occurrence years ago with Chong, Maxx, and China Shark, that resulted in, I believe, China Sharks first banning. Some men, when establishing a comradeship show their rapport by trash talking to each other. Chong & Maxx had many hilarious jabs with each other in this regard. China Shark started talking to the two in the same manner, wanting to be one of the boys before ever being accepted by the two as a comrade. China Shark misunderstood the dynamics and one of many of his firestorms with the group ensued.
When in the army, this trash talking was common for us enlisted men between friends. I mistakenly once thought, this new guy to our unit had the same mentality, and after a few weeks I started trash talking to him. He became offended and wanted to fight me. I misunderstood the dynamics as there had yet been no bond established between us to be able to relate to each others in this manner.
What happened to Mike last year was a post got altered, that because of a mistaken Dynamic, one party thought was a - Just playing with ya mate - the other was deeply hurt.
I think, as a Mod, we have to be very...very carefull when we are deviating from modding to being buddies. What happened in the past can not be undone. Please, all don't start by making it look like we are drawing sides - as I have said before, there is no right or wrong. It is the choice of WHAT KIND OF MOVIE AM I THE STAR IN (as in your life) Do you wish to play the role of the Hero, the person who learns and grows from his earlier downfall/mistake (Think Lethal Weapon), or do you live your life as the constant victim, left to the devices of any two bit director on your demise? My choice is to be the HERO, after all, you get a sandwich named after you.
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For what I see now, at least we have some sort of direction erection. I am sympathetic to the mods. I am not sympathetic of offensive
members (they remain nameless). Just fill in the blank(s). LOL
As one of this site's 'passive' members, I realize a few co- members are somewhat self elevated, self inflated, egotistical, bearers
of hidden agendas, or some other nefarious shit...pretty much to the consternation of others. Usually not a big deal. But now?
This time shit sticks.
My take on this. Many of you watched Saturday Night Live. A bunch of years ago, there was their weekly skit of the Whiner Family.
Go figure the hilarity of it. It made you want to throw your shoe at the TV. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USafh7Onivo
That was funny. This is not.
I was looking for the 'China word' in 'search' that best described the whining Chinese princess's way of manipulation.
I keyed 'whining' and failed my intended, but in failure up popped an old post titled “Newbies Corner / RE: mods
explanation about china-love”. http://www.chnromance.com/index.php/topic,1868.0.html
Wow. 1st time I see this, “the 'China Shark' moment of retrospect”. The gnashing of teeth. Well, it was pretty much the same back
then as it is now. The incident got out of hand. Words were written. A crisis began. It should not have gone that far.
A few of today's members were parties of sort, so I am sure they remember well.
There will always be some conflict, subtle or not. I think we are adults in how we navigate our life. No big fuss unless some member is
genetically blessed 'thin skinned' & chooses not to dis- engage, or some loud lout with a hidden agenda makes his mark.
The general membership base should not be the arena to handle conflict. It creates an unhealthy departure from the reality of what
this website intent is all about.
Just my own personal take on things.
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Everyone has been posting some really great suggestions. Because of my hectic work schedule, as well as other factors, there is going to be a change coming in the very very near future. I am hopeful that this change will offer new insights, new ideas, and hopefully put to rest some of the infighting of late.
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Hello Mike, Shaun, and Ted,
I hope your all happy with your beautiful Chinese ladies! Life for my wife and I is awesome! We keep things simple and disagreements happen less...it's understanding each other!
:) Jim
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Jim,
I missed your post in May. All is well. Glad to hear from you.