China Romance
All About China => Marrying A Lady In China => Topic started by: Arnold on July 29, 2010, 02:18:46 pm
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Anybody getting married soon , may I remind and suggest something you Guy's do before hand . That is , if you are able .. write a promise note to your Lady for the big day . This is special and also a custom , as Qing pointed out to me .. when the time got close for us . Your Lady will also write you one , ones she's aware of your's . Just a thought .
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Arnold, what on earth is a "promise note" ?
My qin ai de hasn't mentioned anything about this, is this a Shanghai tradition?
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Arnold that must be a Shanghai custom.Ive never heard of it before.And the 2 chinese weddings I have ben to in China.They didn't have anything like that.
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Well now , first it is not uncommon or unusual as you make it out to be . Ever heard of Wedding Vow's ? This is exactly what a promise letter is . Only in China it is written down and read in front each other by the groom and bride . I can not believe ( if going through a wedding company ) nobody has mentioned this to either one of the couple getting married . I have posted Qing's letter to me on my Blog and for those that have not seen it . ( The post on April 20 '09 )
I thought why not surprise your Lady before the wedding with it and read it either in English or have it translated to Mandarin to have the wedding Party understand it . Both ours were in two languages for our guest's .
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I asked my wife about this and she said lots of couples do it. She also said it is was becoming more and more popular amongst young people to do this at there weddings now. When I asked why I had never heard of this she just smiled and said because she never told me! :)
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never heard of this either but then again maybe i just wasnt told
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Let's see now , not one came up and said .. good idea .. I will do this for my Lady . What do we have here ? A bunch of lazy -
I don't need this - Member's . It's okay , I know what you're missing out on .. not doing it .
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ok Arnold goooooooooood iiiiiiiiiidea it is but i think not many of us were told about it by
our wives.
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Better late than never!
While my wife was out I wrote my own promise note to Ming Zhi and translated it with google. Then I printed both versions out and when she got home I read them to her. Big hugs and tears followed, then she rushed off to write me one back! Thanks Arnold, many good boy points where earned last night. There now on the front page of a book of all the EMF we sent to each other over the months. I printed them all out. For every letter on one side of an A4 sheet it's in English and the other a Chinese translation. Quite a story from the first admiration letter to the last one before we moved to web cam.
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Paul,
cc us with the names left out and we could all download it and give to our ladies lol!!!!!!!!
with the new names inputted hahahah
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Paul,
cc us with the names left out and we could all download it and give to our ladies lol!!!!!!!!
with the new names inputted hahahah
That is a great idea , what do I get .. not to tell ?
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Thanks Arnold ::) ...Sunny has read this and decided its just a wonderful idea! :o :D
So my homework today is to write one of these!
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When I got married, Zhifang wanted me to write one of these...I thought we were both writing them, but apparently this was not so. Here is what I wrote, if anyone needs help with theirs:
To the love of my life, Li Zhifang.
I have had the honour and priveledge to get to know you since we first met last October. We met in an untraditional way, writing to each other from across the ocean. Every day I would get a new letter from you was like a new beginning. I could not imagine that somewhere in the world was a lady with the most beautiful heart. The longer we wrote, and the more I got to know you, the more I have fallen in love with you. It felt to me, like I had known you all of my life, but just had not met you yet. Everyday was full of hope, and love. The sun shone brighter, and the birds songs we more beautiful, knowing you were in the world.
I knew before we met in person, that I wanted to spend my life you. I knew this, because my heart thought about you all the time. I have followed my heart. You have been the person I have searched for all my life. You are my other half. Zhifang, I pledge my life to you. I promise to spend my life in the pursuit of your happiness, to love, to honour, and to cherish you forever. Our lives have now become as one. Our heart now beats as one.
It is my honour to take you as my wife. And although we come from different worlds, and we speak different languages, our heart speaks one common language. The language of love. I love you with all my heart my beautiful wife. To you, I pledge everything that I am, and everything I will be. Without you, I would be nothing. I look forward to every moment I can spend with you. Every moment with you will be like a lifetime of happiness.
I promise to love you when times are happy, and when times are sad. I will love you when you are sick, and when you are healthy. I will love you when times are prosperous, and when times are a little harder. Nothing in this world could change my love for you. Oceans could not keep our love from growing..distance could not keep our hearts apart..nothing in the world could stop me from loving you for the rest of my life.
These things I promise to you. I love you.
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Martin , that is so beautiful .. it put's mine ashame . This is exactly what a Promise Letter should be .. written from the Heart deep down .. how you feel about the Woman you're about to marry . Thanks for sharing this with us .
Ps: If I could put my Wedding Video up here , one could see .. my embarrassing moment at the Ceremony .. NOT finding my Promise Letter whenit was time to read it . ??? :(
I was so nervous , it was in my Jacket pocket all the time .. but I over-looked it as it was with other papers mixed together . But I had a chance later to read it . I just had to say through the Microphone what I remembered of it . Talk about getting red-faced ?
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I wont promise you that skies will always be blue, but I will promise you rainbows.
I wont promise you that your fingers will never be pricked by a thorn, but I will promise to help find the rose.
I wont promise you that tears will never streak your face, but I will promise to kiss the tears away.
I wont promise that darkness will never again fall, but I will promise you sunlight with a new day.
I wont promise you that you will always be able to find your way, but I will promise to remain by your side.
I wont promise you that your heart will never be broke, but I will promise to bring the glue.
I wont promise you that everyone you love will feel the same way, but I will promise to always love you, that is my promise
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That's very beautiful Ted. Is this what you said to your wife?
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not exactly my written words but is what i said
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arnold this was a good idea, it shows her how much you really care about her..
Martin very beautiful buddy, a shot straight from your heart...
Ted very nice way of putting things...
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Rob , they are only plus points one will gain by doing this and their better then .. well .. no points .
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I've never heard about that, but my wife says that she already knows about it...
saying also that chinese men are romantic... meaning that once again, frenchies are not.
*gluppps*
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Sly , it's never too late ! Write her one while at work or at lunch break , result will be the same .... come here my LaoGong :-*
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Arnold, I am thinking about that ;-)
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I just ask my wife about it.
She told me that she promises to beat me to death if I ever cheat on her.
Well I guess it better than nothing
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Hahaha ... and if she don't ... I will !
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First of all: a really beautiful note, Martin! :D
I talked to my girlfriend about this promise note thing (I don't know what it's called in Chinese so I just called it a 承诺文件，"promise paper/document". I myself thought it was a kind of cute and romantic thing to do. I explained the thought behind it and she understood what I meant. She had never heard of this, however. Neither had her friends when she asked them. In her mind what is said on paper is not worth as much as what is done in real life. Actions before words, so to speak. So I guess it's different for everyone.
Maybe this promise note thing is something that is more popular in some provinces but not in others? I don't know. Given the fact that it is not considered a tradition where we'll marry in Guangdong, I won't write one. Almost a bit disappointed, actually!
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Hans, now that you have mentioned it , just do it and surprise her , as she has asked her friends so maybe they will not be surprised , and you can create the tradition going forward , regards Sujuan and Robert .
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Thanks for the advice, Robert. Maybe I will! :D It is after all a cute thing to do and it's also a challenge to get it all right in Chinese.
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Martin and Ted, You two are genuine poets.
But for my personal, I haven't heard of this promise note beofre.
And I wonn't request my future half to wrote them down only if he likes to write.
There is another Chinese saying" the promise you made is the debt you own"
So now you have lot of debt to pay in the future.hahaha...
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There is another Chinese saying" the promise you made is the debt you own"
So now you have lot of debt to pay in the future.hahaha...
Ohhh I owe now so much to my Wife !
Sweets and Honey I owe for Life and that is very little for my Flower . I think I can live with this debt quite happily . ;) :)
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I wont promise you that skies will always be blue, but I will promise you rainbows.
I wont promise you that your fingers will never be pricked by a thorn, but I will promise to help find the rose.
I wont promise you that tears will never streak your face, but I will promise to kiss the tears away.
I wont promise that darkness will never again fall, but I will promise you sunlight with a new day.
I wont promise you that you will always be able to find your way, but I will promise to remain by your side.
I wont promise you that your heart will never be broke, but I will promise to bring the glue.
I wont promise you that everyone you love will feel the same way, but I will promise to always love you, that is my promise
:D It is brief and to the point