Author Topic: The difference between Chinese and western men  (Read 7157 times)

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Offline Irishman

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Re: The difference between Chinese and western men
« Reply #15 on: November 27, 2011, 09:11:05 PM »
She tells me that it is not right for a husband to show his appreciation and say "thank you" to his wife, Now i know she loves being appreciated, Happy wife, Happy life, :) John.
My Sunny is the exact same. I must admit I found it strange to begin with but as time goes by I find it more genuine and nice. I always get a smile or a kiss for doing something nice. A thank you is nice, but give me a nice smile or a kiss any day :) . Maybe I am old fashioned. I prefer the Chinese way. We will raise our kids this way but will tell them to say thanks outside the family.
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Offline john1964

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Re: The difference between Chinese and western men
« Reply #16 on: November 27, 2011, 11:23:28 PM »
I agree with you Irish man, A smile or a kiss is a nice way to show appreciation, I got a lovely message from MinYing a few days ago saying " I never knew a kiss could mean so much, I just want you to kiss me, I have never enjoyed such treatment, I will love you always".
I still say "Thank you" for minor things when we are on-line every night and i know she enjoys the appreciation, Now her attitude has changed and if  she is to be late for our nightly QQ  chat I always say that I will wait for her and her reply is "Thank you husband".
I asked her about a month ago that if she never met a foreigner through Chnlove what she would have done, Her reply was that she never wanted to be with another Chinese man and she  would have spent the rest of her life alone, Her words, not mine, John.

Offline Peter501

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Re: The difference between Chinese and western men
« Reply #17 on: November 30, 2015, 11:24:33 PM »
So it appears to be true.    99% of Chinese men give the rest bad name LOL.

Offline JohnB

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Re: The difference between Chinese and western men
« Reply #18 on: March 06, 2016, 02:02:45 PM »
I think the financial stakes to marry a Chinese woman has unwittingly altered, what we think in the West,
is the marriage 'game plan'. You can put all culturalisms aside if Chinese men are willing/ having to pay a large
dowry to her family in order to marry their sweethearts.
A shocking, albeit unverified, story has been making the rounds on Chinese social media, highlighting concerns
over the traditional practice of paying a bride price. It was a tale that resonated with many Chinese people. A local
station ran a story about a man who wanted to marry his pregnant girlfriend. But when he wasn't able to afford a
payment of more than £20,000 (about $30,000), the woman's father put an end to any talk of a prospective
wedding - and forced his daughter to get an abortion. It's unclear whether there's any actual truth to the story. The
man wasn't identified by the station and attempts to contact him or find out more have been unsuccessful. But the
strong reaction to the story online points to a larger issue anxiety over the rising cost of bride prices in a country where
there's a marked shortage of women.

BBC Trending Radio
More on this story from the BBC World Service here.
The bride price is similar to a dowry, but paid from prospective groom to the family of the bride,
rather than from the bride to the groom's side of the family. Manya Koetse, China expert and editor
of What's on Weibo, says it's a centuries-old tradition in the country that lived on through the
communist era. And Koetse, who initially spotted the story of the man and his girlfriend making the
rounds on Chinese social networks, says the sums involved today are rising in step with China's growing
"It was there in the 1950s, 60s, 70s... In that time the bride price could be a thermos flask, or bedding,"
she says. "Later on it became furniture, then a radio or a watch. When we come to the 1980s it could
have been a television or a refrigerator. And since China's economy has been opening up, that's when the
bride price started changing into hard cash."
Economic prosperity is one reason for the rising bride price, but another key factor is the shortage of women
caused by China's one-child policy.
A traditional preference for males who provide labour and traditionally look after their parents in old age led to
a huge increase in sex-selective abortion and even neglect and infanticide of female babies.
Currently, according to Harvard researchers, there are 118 men for every 100 women in China, and an
"extra" 40 million males in the country.
Consequently, in some areas the bride price has skyrocketed, and the people who are most hurt by this
are men in rural areas.
"They're called 'bare branches'," says Koetse, "guys who are very poor, aren't educated, they don't have
a wife or children, so they're like a tree without leaves. There are villages across China which are full of men
like this."
"They have double trouble actually," she says. "Women leave these villages to move to bigger cities to find a
man who can offer them more than the guys in the village. And the few women who remain might have 20 men
each who want to marry them, so they can ask for a high bride price."
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Join the conversation on this and other stories here.
The Harvard researchers say the gender imbalance could lead to higher crime and social unrest among a "restless
class of single men".
As for the reaction to the story about the man whose girlfriend was forced to get an abortion, Koetse says the
online reactions in China to the local news were somewhat surprising, at least to Westerners. Many people
defending the father's actions and criticising the couple for getting involved with each other without thinking of the
the implications. Others took a different view and criticised the bride price tradition.

With the Chinese gender imbalance of 120 men to every 100 women, things are going to be much different soon,
but I am willing to think with the Chinese economy in transition, the willingness to pay exorbitant monies may be muted. 
Maybe windows of opportunity still exists in the marriage playing field for the wise & persistent Western man.

Offline Robertt S

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Re: The difference between Chinese and western men
« Reply #19 on: March 06, 2016, 03:04:32 PM »
 Sooner or later the government will have to step in and ease the hormonal strain on the male population! It will not be too long before the men get tired of the high priced local women and look elsewhere for love at more affordable cost.  Thailand, Vietnam, Philippines, Cambodia, India, and Indonesia are loaded with women who are just as pretty and just as capable of being an excellent wife and mother.
 The Chinese government could also help by reducing the immigration obstacles that Chinese citizens face when trying to bring foreign brides into China. The Chinese woman would be wise to look back at the auto industry in Detroit and see what happened when the unions over-priced themselves.
 I also believe the attitude towards foreign men running around China looking for brides is going to change also since the supply of eligible Chinese women is so limited, may be some cases where the foreigners are blamed for driving up the dowry prices and taking eligible local women from them.
 The silver lining in this cloud is that now maybe the left-over women will get a second chance at happiness! ;D 8) :)
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