Forget about the thin ice - now my marraige is Icecalating out of control

[Rhonald]

Yes Dave, although my post was partial tongue-in-cheek, there was also an elemental storm of truth to my post as well.

The warning signs were there, but I had misunderstood foul weather signs for fair weather signs. The two weeks preceding last weeks tsunami of emotions from her forecasted thunderstorms ahead . So what were the warning signs you may ask? Why did I not heed Red Sky at Dawn? Well gather around my fellow Nepholologists, and let me elucidate you upon Wisdom found only amongst that most rarefied part of the Internet - The Cloud.

Since the purchase for my wife for Valentine's Day was a tablet - she didn't want jewelry, and her app installation of "We Chat", she has been in social discourse with fellow Chinese ladies living here in North America. Some of the ladies had married foreigners, while others had immigrated with their Chinese husbands. So often she would report other ladies having problems with their lives here, with many expressing desire or going through with a divorce. Her retort was always with the affirmative that our marriage was better and we were doing good. I misunderstood this as that we were all good for clear sailing ahead.

Amongst Men, silence maybe Golden, but for a Man with a Woman, reassurance is the best Insurance. I should have realized that her undue attention, and multiple comments about her other friends situations meant that she was feeling insecure. Also, I have come to see that too much Social Media, can lead to unwanted weather fronts. She loves doing things and ideal minds that dwell in Social media.....well lets say.... does not end well. Instead of Social Media, a little Social outgoing, and our escapades has turned into Ice Capades.

My wife is very outgoing, so much so that Willy can attest to her going out of her way to drive his trike between a rock and a hard place. The young, athletic girl in the picture was practicing some ice dance moves that with my wife's applauding and calling her over, she asked for the two of them to share in a few pictures. What a tough job I have, taking pictures of pretty girls, all in a row!

Just a little Snap shot in a day in the life of being married to a Chinese lady.

[Willy The Londoner]

My wife is very outgoing, so much so that Willy can attest to her going out of her way to drive his trike between a rock and a hard place.

My lips were sealed on that incident that is until now.   My trike ended with the two smallest scratches ever.  The rock also survived the encounter. However the lady and her son who were a couple of feet away with no where to run to - that was a different matter. I hear that it took three days laundry for them to get rid of all the evidence of that encounter!

Willy

[Philip]

Hi Ron, I'm glad that you are seeing things from a fresh pair of ice. Snow joke, living with a Chinese wife. Even though she seems to see less than zero future for her busking, passion for what she does + being good at what she does + being paid for what she does makes her a hotter prospect than most of us poor saps. The problem is not her wanting to make money, the problem is her listening to and believing the outpourings of people she barely knows who want to bring her down with the self-justifications of why they think they failed.
You Canadians start sunbathing when the temperature gets above zero degrees celsius - you're made of strong stuff - come on, get your skates on, think up a new skime.

[maxx]

so what happened.

[Robertt S]

Nice to see you around again! Hopefully some more old timers will check in!

[maxx]

thought I would pop in and take a look.to see how many of these relationships are still going.

[Rhonald]

Hello Maxx, well my wife is still trying to extract information from me but I am not sure how much longer I can hold out before blurting out more than Rank, Name & Serial Number!

[maxx]

smash the offending device.Tell your wife the dog did it.To much outside influence is not good on any marriage. They get to thinking that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.They don't look at this long term.Like how are they going to support themselves.

anyway I watch this show on the TV every now and then.Just for a good laugh.It's called 90 day fiancée.I can't beleave the stupid shit these people say and do to each other.Some of the people are green card chasers.I see that.But the rest of them are just fucking morons looking for drama.You got some 60 yr old guy chaseing a 22 yr old hooker who is messing with another 60 yr old man. a 22 year old Russian girl who is pushing maximum density.who is a gold digger.with a fiancée that can't afford a pizza and a diet coke. One American woman fiancé is 3 years older then her daughter.

anyway how many of you are still with your chosen one. I am  we have been married 12 years now we have 3 boys.And my wife just graduated from her first English class.I think the reason that we are still together is that we went at this with open eyes. And open communication

what are your thoughts on this if your still with your chosen one.

[Gus]

Congrats. How beautiful!

[JohnB]

Maxx,

your composition skills are vastly improved! is your wife teaching you?


Jing & me... 7 years now, via the once beloved/ now reviled “Chnlove.com” agency. 
Ours, a 10- day dance before marriage. I took a lot of shit Stateside at the get- go,
but I am of the nature.. go f*ck yourself!

A good assessment as it turns out. Jing, the lousy candidate for American citizenship,
has not changed whatsoever from the woman I met. So, my marriage with Jing has
been relatively harmonious. I never wanted to change her.
From that far off dance of whatever crazy expectations we had entertained back then,
we now find each other as the perfect complement for the other. I love my wife, but
just as important, I like her. 

Your “90 Day Fiancee”.. I stumbled on this one time. A big, fat- assed blond, cinched up
like a f*cking sausage was on the program. I could not bring myself to watch that or beyond.
Maybe I'll give it another go.

Check out the joke thread. Now, that is a lonely venture there from what it was long ago.

wish you the best in life Maxx.


hey Gus, you're back from China? & all you have is 3 words? 哈哈哈
how was your visit?

[Willy The Londoner]

Hi Everyone

I have been told that I have not posted much of late. Just nothing for me to reply too.

That is until today.

I see Maxx's post  that mentions 90 day Fiance.  It sounds like a crap show but fortunately I have never seen it. However I do get Discovery Channel here in China and there is a mixture of very good and extremely bad programs.

But the very worst concerns a group of Hill Billies searching the Appolasian Mountains for Big Foot. Now these people are allowed to carry an assortment of firearms which they run around with in the dark and look petrified upon hearing any sound.  I wonder why know one has been killed by their imbicilic actions. Or maybe the producers insist that there the guns are unloaded.,   I think that is the number one program that gets switched off.

 But I am able to go to the football channels where I can watch the very best of English, German and Italian leagues, often live.  For the less educated  in the Worlds number one sport then exchange the name Football to Soccer.

Well my journey started in 2009 and 9 years later we are still going 'strong'.  That 'strong' is not for the relationship that is for my health. In my body I feel fine but my legs are a different matter. But approaching my 76 birthday I am loved  so what more could I need as I look forward to spending the rest of my days, whether they be long or short in number,  in China.

Willy

[Gus]

Hey JohnB,

Shanghai was beautiful! Lihong and I had a GREAT time. We did a day tour of Suzhou, walked thru Shanghai, talked, laughed, studied for Lihong's upcoming Embassy interview (we hope it is somewhat soon... our paperwork has been forwarded to USA NVC Dept of State). We ate lots of unique food (very different than Beijing, Guangzhou and Liuzhou). I am madly in love with my sweet Lihong and the country of China. The more I know find out and visit the more I want to be able to travel there often (and hopefully retire there with my wife and learn more about all of China (culture, music, food, traditions). But for now we will continue to be patient and wait for the USA to approve Lihongs travel here. It is all fascinating, overwhelming, and bewildering. We still have language hurdles (Luckily Lihong's English is MUCH better than my minimal Chinese (but it does keep us both laughing.) I am always amazed at the helpfulness of Chinese people. It is such a different world for me. I am open for any/all advice you long timers can shed on me, about the journey, the challenges, the language communication process, everything. Well I have written enough for now...

Gus

[JohnB]

 
Hey Gus,
Yours is a good read. 

I'll be retired in China sometime this year. Maybe you too someday.
Willy probably is one of the best “go- to” guys on this thread on life in China. Willy is a constant presence here. Just read a few of his posts.
RobertS, of course, is the “go- to” guy on Lihong's immigration to the States. Robert is the “legal eagle”.

There is always someone here who can help you navigate the legalize to & fro, China. Do not be afraid to ask.

I am happy for you.
Wish you & Lihong all the best in life's offerings.

[Willy The Londoner]

Just a thought about visa etc.

Now that Prince Harry has married American Meghan Merkle I wonder how long it will it will take for her to be granted ''Leave to remain'' in the UK.

Willy

[Robertt S]

Just a thought about visa etc.

Now that Prince Harry has married American Meghan Merkle I wonder how long it will it will take for her to be granted ''Leave to remain'' in the UK.

Willy

I will hazard a guess and say that her " Leave to remain" application will be "hand-walked through the immigration bureau since Prince Harry does have "friends" in high places! Old military saying is " R.H.I.P."